Managing Notorious Emotions: Depression

drcmorgan
Aug 19
3 min read

Now that you have become an expert in curbing your anxiety, let’s have a closer look at what you can do when you feel sad. When we become overly depressed, the opposite happens to our bodies compared to when we are anxious: now our car is not getting enough petrol or energy to drive, and we need to engage in behaviours that energise us. This is why, when you are depressed, you may feel flat and listless, have difficulty getting out of bed to start your day, experience thoughts of impending doom, and feel as though everyday activities are a big burden to complete. You may also notice that you move less and more slowly than when you are not sad, and that sometimes you are less inclined to speak—or speak more slowly and with fewer words—than you do when you are not sad.

In my book, I discuss several techniques to help you re-energise yourself when you are depressed. These include behavioural activation (scheduling pleasurable and achievement-oriented activities), teaching yourself to become more optimistic, exploring your explanatory style, learning to become more hopeful, and “Dancing with the Memes.”

Pleasure and Achievement Scheduling aims to help you become more mindful of how you spend your time and achieve a better balance between things you love doing and things that give you a sense of accomplishment. When you engage in both, you become more energised, as your body releases endorphins and serotonin that counter the sluggish effects of depression or sadness. Practising Activity Scheduling regularly can also bring about a state of Flow—achieved when there is a perfect balance between skill and challenge. When we experience the pleasure that follows a state of Flow, we cannot feel depressed at the same time. This is why activating our behaviour through pleasure and achievement scheduling makes us more energised, and this energy combats depression. Both pleasure and achievement are necessary to effectively combat depression, as we need both elements to enter Flow. Flow, in turn, results in happiness.

Dancing with the Memes is a lovely technique that I have adapted. This technique is designed to help you cope with the more destructive or negative parts of yourself that we all have. For example, you may struggle to manage your temper, regret being harsh with someone, or loathe yourself when you fail to stand up for your rights. This technique helps you cope with these parts of yourself when they threaten to surface.

Dancing with the Memes

Define an area of weakness in your personality or circumstances that you feel is unlikely to change and has caused you much difficulty in the past.
Create a Meme that embodies these characteristics or circumstances, such as “Controlling Claire,” “Disrespectful Dennis,” or “Angry Agatha.”
Acknowledge the offence or failure your Meme has caused, e.g., “I guess Disrespectful Dennis made his appearance again when we had dinner with my parents last week.”
Think about what you can do to prevent your Meme from affecting your relationships in the future, e.g., “I can excuse myself when Disrespectful Dennis threatens to unleash his fury and go outside to calm down while I breathe. This may soothe him for a while.”
Consider what you would say to your Meme to soothe or calm them.
Reflect on how you felt when you tried this technique and whether you were successful.